Since relationships are important to us as humans, when one ends, it’s difficult on many levels. This is true even if you’re the one who initiated it. You’re now facing the world alone, perhaps a sense of rejection or dashed future fantasies … and you may not have even seen it coming. However, there are several things you can do to help ease the pain.
There are things to do to help the healing from a broken heart.
1. Allow yourself to feel whatever emotion you’re experiencing. It may range and vary between hurt, sadness, disappointment, or anger. Trying to fight off your feelings and “get on with it,” won’t work. This is a time to be caring and nurturing to you.
2. Give yourself permission to count on others. Having someone (or several people) with whom you feel safe to “be yourself” during this healing from a broken heart period will be very comforting. Support will be most valuable if you let them know how you’d like to be taken care of, e.g. just listen, get you out of the house, offer their insights.
3. Use visualizations to release feelings. The brain can’t distinguish between reality and fantasy. Use your imagination to convey feelings you’d like to express to the person who’s no longer your partner.
4. Try free association writing. Another tool to release feelings is to write as fast as you can. This type of writing helps to purge emotions.
5. Make a list of the partnership/person. No one is perfect nor is any relationship. Create a list of the things you didn’t like. Keep this with you and when you’re feeling down, take it out to remind you of what wasn’t good between the two of you.
6. Clear those “garbage thoughts.” Too often, you may find yourself saying very negative things about you to you. Start to be aware of what your thoughts are and if they’re negative or self-critical, do some thought-stopping.
7. Make a list of your attributes. Your relationship may very well have ended; that doesn’t necessarily mean it had anything to do with you. Since you’re likely to be feeling down on yourself as a result of the breakup, remind yourself of all that is positive about you.
Though it may be hard to imagine that the pain you feel now will ever subside, it will! Using some of these tips will make the process go smoother. You can heal from a broken heart and go on to find another love.